31

It's Happy Birthday to me.  Today I hit the milestone marker of my 31st birthday.  I am surprised at how hard it is to recognize this birthday and that I am turning 31 than any other birthday I have had.  I guess it's a mark of growing up when you hit the first age that is hard to turn.

But, I guess that is the testament to how things change, even in a few years.  How thoughts and feelings change.  Ok, maybe how much slower they change because as a teenager it was acceptable to change my opinion as I learned a new lesson.  So, maybe, yeah.  How my ideas and feelings slowly change over the course of time, and they can change 180 degrees.

So, with the aging thing - it is just a cruel reminder of how my life is not at all like I planned,  How I actually have to come up with a new plan.  I marvel at the other singles that reach 31 and can transition graciously from a YSA ward back into a home ward.  It's like losing not only your ward, but your friends, social outlet, calling, and an identity.  And, it's hard.  But it's also acknowledging a dream that is now very likely not to occur.  And, trying to figure out a new path in life.  That's the hard part.

So, now, a new set of years to look forward too.  A new path to discover.  And another way to learn a new way of patience, a new outlook, and another whole group of fun, exploring, and happiness!

Happy 31.